1. Kate Middleton will elope with Paulo Nutini.
2. Paulo will get 8 out of 10.
3. St. Simon of the Cowell will brand the internet evil following the failure of the X Factor finalists charity single to reach the top twenty.
4. 'Breaking rocks in the hot sun' will become the motto of all state funded nurseries as the under 5's are challenged to become part of the 'Big Society'.
5. Ford motor cars will launch the 'Flintstone' as petrol prices climb out of control...The Head of Ford will state that '...the Flinstone is available in any style you like...as long as it's floor-less...'
From the all seeing eye of Stargazer Steve...
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